Biggest joy, greatest heartache

I can see how God must feel about us through my kids. They are my biggest joy and can have the power to be my greatest heartache.

What I mean by that is I never experienced how I could love another person so much until I met my husband and kids. It is beyond words. I remember taking my daughter home from the hospital. As we were crossing the street to our apartment, I thought: “I would dive in front of a car for her.”

I’m a bit of a pessimist so I tend to envision the worst case scenario. All. the. time. But I’m working on changing that! However, when I have these visions of terrible things happening, I can feel the deep sense of sorrow and agony if anything were to happen to my family. Wish I could control the events in my life but it’s an exercise to grow in my trust in God.

When I think of the love for my family, it only helps me understand God’s love for me. I love the following scripture for that reason:

“He found him in a desert land,
and in the howling waste of the wilderness;
he encircled him, he cared for him,
he kept him as the apple of his eye.
Like an eagle that stirs up its nest,
that flutters over its young,
spreading out its wings, catching them,
bearing them on its pinions, — Dt 32:10-11

We are the apple of God’s eye. He always sees us and does everything he can to protect us. Of course some situations don’t feel like we’re being protected. In those times, it helps me to consider what am I being called upon to grow in.

That can be a scary thought. But like the scripture reminds us, God is right there, waiting to swoop us up if we can’t handle it. Like the eagle and it’s young.

Here are some pictures from the last couple of weeks:

What a whirlwind the last couple of days have been! One day before my delivery date, my water breaks and three hours later, we have a son. I’ll spare the pregnancy story but am grateful he’s out! He left his mark.

Just after 38 weeks… counting down!


Day 1… the boy with an unexpected amount of long, brown hair!


My mom who came for the birth.


Decorating for Christmas. Keeping it simple!



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